timmy.whitwell@btinternet.com

I can't actually type anything on the computer upstairs because vodka was spilt on my keyboard (in March) and most of the keys don't work, but I can attach the photos if you send me an email.  RE: vodka.  I didn't do the spilling, so I shouldn't have to buy the keyboard, which is the reason why it still doesn't work (Theresa has a laptop, so I get first dibs on that, but I'm still waiting for a replacement keyboard that's never gonna appear).  It's a rubbish stand-off that I'm losing.  So I basically only check my emails when I go upstairs to look at porn.

"Why are you going upstairs?"
"To sort out my MP3 player"

Works like a charm.